Example of analysis of an argument essay: score 2
Last updated: 13 Oct 2008
The following is part of a business plan of an investment firm:
"Studies indicate that the average person exercises less as he gets older. At the same time, the number of hours a person spends watching television tends to increase as he ages. Since the percentage of senior citizens in the population will increase over the next two decades, we ought to, therefore, consider selling our shares in Runrite shoes in order to increase our investment in the Worldwide Television Co."
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusions.
This argument is not necessarily true in the folowing 3 ways: firstly,excercising is a life long habit of people which do not usually change when they get old;secondly,even if the the indication of the study is true,it only showed the trend in the past,what people in the next two decades will do is still uncertain;thirdly,the increase of the percentage of the old does not necessarilly reduce the Runrite shoes profit,because there are other ways to increase profits of a company except simply increase the sales.
The argument would be much more plausable if it is more specific.
Comments
This essay receives a 2. The author makes some good points, but the essay is not nearly long enough for a 30-minute essay.
Additionally, there are grammar and word-choice problems that interfere with the author's meaning.
Our advice: spend more time actually writing and editing.
