Example of analysis of an issue essay: score 5
Last updated: 13 Dec 2006
"Money is the root of all evil"
Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the opinion above. Support your point of view with reasons and/or examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.
This is an old proverb, and it is still quoted in the 1990's. This suggests to me that it articulates a popularly held belief.
It is certainly true that many religions require the foresaking of money and power as part of a disciple's progression within that religion. In other words, a lack of money - or at least a lack of desire for it - is regarded as a good thing. It is hardly surprising that the corollary has become widely accepted, i.e. that the desire for money is a bad thing.
However, tempting as it is to subscribe to this view, I feel bound to point out that it is but an oversimplification of a more complex issue, and is also - if taken literally - inaccurate.
Money itself cannot be the root of all evil. Money is, after all, but a token exchanged by people in return for goods, services and so on. The Soviet Union found out that reducing the significance of money in the system did not help. Rather, people then focussed on goods as trading tools, and power and influence became sought after.
Furthermore, even if we allowed a modification to the proposition, and made it "The lust for money is the root of all evil", then we would still be guilty of oversimplification. In essence, humankind will always want to be better clothed, better fed, safer, and to have more time to enjoy ourselves - and in most parts of the world this requires money. Hence the push for better living conditions, shorter working hours, and so on. It only takes a 'spin doctor' to turn this into a wanton pursuit of betterment with no regard to cost, or - if it's a really negative spin - that human endeavour and achievement in this area are all evil, and that "The lust for money is the root of all evil".
No, there is clearly a moral difference between a desire for betterment, and a single-minded lust for money and/or power. Money is not in itself bad, nor is the desire for it. Even if it were, we can substitute "Power" for "Money" and still have a workable proverb. Evil can be ascribed to many things, as indeed it has been. People - individually and collectively - commit evil acts without a desire for money. The tragedy for us all is that the human heart - more than any thing else - is the root of all evil.
by Jim Wickham
12th September, 1999
Comments
This essay receives a 5.
This is an extremely well-written essay, as GMAT essays go. The argument is sound, the writing is clear, and the essay had a logical organization.
If we have a criticism, it is that the rather superfluous introductory paragraph could have been either a) eliminated or b) incorporated in the following paragraph.
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